Andrew Mercado’s TV Guide: Delicious, Dark Secrets and Madonna

TV critic Andrew Mercado’s rundown on what to watch on the box this week

Dawn French & Iain Glen


Delicious – 8.15pm Saturday on ABC

Australians love anything with Dawn French in it, so they should go sick for this 2016 drama from Sky TV. Dawn plays the (rather naughty) ex-wife of a renowned chef (Game Of Thrones’ Iain Glen) who has a second wife who suspects him of having an affair. There’s also a problematic daughter, horny teenage son and a mother-in-law (the wonderful Sheila Hancock) and everything takes place in the lush countryside of Cornwall. The first episode will leave you wanting more and the whole thing is nothing short of what it’s title says – delicious. 

Dark Secrets: Australia’s Hidden Shame – 8.30pm Sunday on Seven

Ray Martin is a journalist who has never overstayed his welcome, and his forays into television these days are reserved for only worthy occasions. So, after two series of SBS’ fascinating First Contact, now he is back in regional Australia to host this news special about domestic violence. Seven thinks so highly of it has even bumped back Sunday Night to a 9.30pm start, where it will go head to head with 60 Minutes at 9pm and a hastily scheduled Schapelle telemovie repeat at 10pm.

Madonna: Rebel Heart Tour – 9.30pm Monday on Nine

Programmed and then pulled twice from the schedule, it will be fascinating to see if the third time is a charm for Nine, which seems nervous about whether or not the supposed Queen of Pop can still pull an audience. This time around, her Rebel Heart concert, filmed in Sydney no less, is said to run for two and a half hours, which is much longer than when it was originally set to run back during the first week of The Voice

Neighbours 6.30pm Tuesday on Eleven

Several months back – nine, in fact – Paige (Olympia Valance) jumped out of an out-of-control hot air balloon into a lake. Jack (Andrew Morley), an amnesiac who had just remembered he was a priest, rescued her and whisked her off to a barn to warm up. Of course, he did more than that and tonight, Paige heads back to the same barn to reminisce … and naturally, her waters break. With Susan (Jackie Woodburne) suffering a relapse of her multiple sclerosis and Piper (Mavournee Hazel) still struggling with a broken leg, nobody can drive for help, and of course there is no mobile phone reception to get Dr Karl (Alan Fletcher) to save the day. It’s all a bit Thorn Birds lite, but this constant reference to a barn could also suggest the impending birth could be somewhat biblical. 

Empire – 10.35pm Thursday on Eleven

Creator Lee Daniels wasn’t too happy last year when he claims he was tricked into doing Mariah’s World, the underwhelming reality series from E! But it would appear that the pair have kissed and made up because Mariah Carey, who also starred in Daniels’ movie Precious, is now appearing int he third series of the hit hip hop drama which quietly snuck into Eleven’s schedule a few weeks back. Mariah plays a singer called Kitty whose first appearance is blink and miss before a second brief moment singing a duet with Jamal (Jussie Smollett). And that’s it. Why you wouldn’t put Kitty into a catfight with Cookie (Taraji P. Henson) is a mystery but given Carey’s reputation, maybe the best way to deal with her is keep it short and sweet.

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